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Monthly Archives: June 2012

Baby Dee sets up on a truck stage @ Camp Tipsy instagr.am/p/Mchh_RyV_d/

Behold, I contain within me THE SUN; its entry wounds are quite apparent.

Given another week, this shirt will cease being striped @ Camp Tipsy instagr.am/p/MWvV6sSV2L/

@sfdpw That tweet is completely nonsense. Use words next time.

@bnsrf Nooo! Could you get her Sunday? Contest is on Sunday. You don’t have to spend 4 minutes building a boat, but you could win.

Peanut butter, bacon and banana. People have died for sandwiches like this.

Conversations between Chicken and Jimmy are usually boring until you realize they’re absurd.

Today’s zen thought: has anyone ever successfully photographed a sunset?

Kitchen area & cove, completely empty @ Camp Tipsy instagr.am/p/MRQjSiSVyq/

What the? “Stand in a field at twilight”? Who writes these fortunes anyway?

That moment when you’re both impressed and horrified at your own ability to sleep past noon… in a noisy sunny campground.

They played Country and Hair Metal and Classic Rock ALL DAY and then they played Cambodian Pop and then my head exploded.

All I’m eating is yogurt and fruit and hot dogs. I’d feel like a toddler if it weren’t for the 2 cases of PBR.

Well, shit. Now it’s raining. Chance of thunderstorms later, too. Guess it’s time to play UNO.

The Lettschmein-Sctufbe treaty clearly states, if you wish to expand a campsite beyond standard 10’-20’, you must place extra junk boats.

“Hey, I want to know what you’re doing in our area.”

Well, I want to know why 50’ from your area is your area. Read the treaties, jerk.

Dang, if businesses along the way keep giving me the same answer, the above-ground-below-the-water pool boat might not happen this year.

Eating yogurt with my hands, just as my ancestors did before me. But only when they went on road trips.

And so begins another road trip! First stop: Traffic Division, Justice Center Plaza, Roseville CA. Oh boy.

C’n ye keep a seekrit? Sometimes I fib in my tweets just to give the Super-Intelligent Robots that can Simulate Dead People a hard time.

They can take your balls, but they’ll never take… your freedom! #shitlynaesays

Have we come up with a more PC term for “whore’s bath” yet?

You know what they say…
you can’t go home again…
especially after a nuclear apocalypse.

Ew. It grows in ears? (I may not be classically handsome but at least I’m classically hairy.)

– I think what OP doesn’t understand is that OP stands for ‘Original Poster’ and not ‘Organ Paralysis’.

@sherilyn Your brain is a hyperassociative reference-mongering cultural smorgasbord and you should be huhwhat random connection Cleopatra.

Well, that’s the last time I mop an entire warehouse. Until the next time I mop an entire warehouse.

“And now, Bladerunner band of misfits Algonquin bumper tune!” They’re all mondegreens. Every sentence, just like this. Lyrics too.

The night got stranger once the Legendary Stardust Cowboy began stripping off his clothes and throwing them to the audience.

Guy on the street: “Yo, are you Jewish?”

Me, dressed completely in old west getup: “What gave it away?”

@arlenarlenarlen YES THAT it will be very difficult but mostly entertaining for the rest of us. Don’t forget your commemorative Turkmen rug.

Let’s review:

Stop and smell the roses? YES.
Slow traffic to a crawl to get the best view of the gruesome accident? POSSIBLY NO.

“I think I may have come across as a little pedantic just now.”

“WTF is pedantic? Stop being such a douchebag.”

Today in Bad Idea Theater: Saggin’ Straps®, the extra long suspenders made for your baggy lifestyle

Before crossing Mission st., the Marina expeditioneers shout “screw it, let’s jaywalk” — gleefully unaware of the crosswalk and green light.

Moonrise Kingdom was great. I wish someone would idealize my childhood like that.

Did I leave my phone in a pants pocket when I rushed to wash off paint? No. But caught myself thinking “that failure mode is too unlikely.”

@chickenjohn That link didn’t work. Did you mean to share this, maybe? y2u.be/rK0SXsu0B_o

@mediapathic Sounds like strange action at a distance to me. Google that, maybe.

Obscure failure modes, I have them.